Ending and Beginnings

I saw a quote once that I loved, because it seems to be a perfect discription of how I try to live my life. It said: Every story has and end, but in life every ending is just a new beginning. I don't regret the stories in my life that have ended at all, because I know that everything happens for a reason, and each chapter just brings me closer to the end of the book. I thought I was completely in love with someone, but as they say, love is blind, and for some odd reason I couldn't see that he didn't love me the same way. Another story that has suddenly ended, and at first I thought I would just die from the pain. Two days later, here I am, still alive and kickin, and dealing much better than I thought. I know there are many opportunities for love out there, and eventually some day, maybe sooner than I think, it will find me. After realizing that he didn't feel the same and putting myself in his shoes, I realized that I don't want to be with someone that doesn't want me. Also enlightening was the fact that most of the things my love for him was stemming from weren't real. So, therefore, how could I feel so strongly when they were feelings that came based from a lie? I'm keeping my chin up, and it is hard to get used to being alone again, but I have my girls keeping me smiling. They are the best medicine for heartbreak in the whole world. When I look at them I realize, that no man in this world will ever make me feel the way they do. I'm going to move on, not give up on love, and not blame the next person for someone else's mistakes. I know I have enough love inside of me to give it all to someone who will eventually not abuse it and it will be the best feeling of fulfillment in the world. There's someone out there for me, I know it. Even though at times it seems like he'll never show his face, but I can feel it out there somewhere, even though I may have never met him yet. Then again, maybe I have met him already and opportunity has not made it possible for us quite yet. Who knows...but I won't give up and I won't let rejection defeat me. Someone will love me for who I am, mistakes and all, and not judge me for them. Someone will realize that all I have ever wanted is to be completely in love and not have a doubt in my mind. That I want that person to be by my side when I'm sick, give me a hug when I cry, and holding my hand as I take my last breath of life.

Things I Love

The little things I love the most...
The little things I love the most...
-I love that I miss someone
-watching my kids play make-believe
-Sydney's laugh
-Katy's arguments
-writing
-driving in the country for no reason
-gas station pizza
-dressing up for a nice sushi dinner
-popcorn and a movie
-kissing boo boo's
-adrenaline from watching a scary movie
-hearing "Good morning, Mommy"
-saying "I love you" and meaning it
-clean kids and jammy's after a bath
-birthday's
-feeding the ducks with the girls
-sunsets
-sunrises in the summer at the lake
-my refrigerator covered in children's drawings
-going for a ride in a hot car
-laughing
-crying
-getting a txt msg that just says "I miss you"
-poems
-irony
-cuddling on the couch
-proving a point
-reading a fairy tale book with a perfect ending
-Disney movies
-BBQ's
-listening to my girls have a real discussion from outside the room
-the way my dog thinks she can talk to me
-my cat AJ's loyalty through thick and thin
-my life
-thunderstorms
-cooking
-music
-thinking about things I don't have the answer to
-putting a smile on someone else's face
-answering "Are we there yet?"
-surprises
-flowers for no reason
-love songs
-walks
-goodnight kisses
-holding hands
-pictures
-when my kids outgrow their shoes
-winter clothes
-floating on the river in the hot summer sun
-camp fires
-fairies
-dragonflies
-laying on the cool grass on a hot summer night and looking at the stars
.....I could go on forever, but these are just a few

Blue Plate Monday's

So my English professor has this awesome blog that I found. She does a little thing she likes to call "Blue Plate Monday's" in which you enter a recipe to share each Monday. Why "Blue"? Because she collects pieces of dishware that are blue and white, and by the looks of it, she has alot to be proud of. Anyway, as I have mentioned before, I love to cook, and like finding new dishes to prepare for my family. I also love to share my recipes unlike many women out there who think they consist of gold flakes somewhere in the ingredients and won't share. I like knowing that people enjoy my food, and it makes me feel accomplished to know that they enjoy it. So here is one that I get alot of compliments on, and I hope you like it as much as I do. It's a recreation I got from my mom, that she actually recreated first after ordering it in a restaurant (I like my version better tho).

Mushroom Bowls

4 large Portebello Mushroom tops
small container ricotta cheese
8 oz.french onion dip
4 oz.sour cream
shredded Italian blend cheese
box of seafood beer batter
butter flavored crisco

First you will need to heat up a deep fryer or butter flavored crisco in a deep pan. Also, preheat oven to 350. First cut off any stem that may be left on the mushrooms so they are flat on the bottom. Wash the mushrooms and set aside lightly folded up in a paper towel to dry. Mix the batter according to the directions, you can use the preference of beer vs. water to your liking and set aside. Next mix the ricotta, sour cream and french onion together in a seperate bowl. Once the oil is heated up, dip the mushrooms in the batter and coat them completely, and fry for only about a minute and a half each, then set aside to cool for about 5 mins. Now, flat side of the mushrooms up, pile on the mix of dip, sour cream and ricotta until there's a pretty good amount on top. Sprinkle the shredded cheese on top of that until again a good amount (more the better). Now, place the mushrooms on a cookie sheet covered with aluminum foil, because this will end up a little messy! Put into the oven for about 10 mins or until the cheese is melted and the topping is spilling over. Now, just cut into it and enjoy! It's a little messy to eat but is very filling and goes great with some pasta!

A Blog About Blogging

In the past I had used blogging a few times on Myspace just to get things out that I needed to get off my chest, or maybe to post an inspiring poem or two that I would find occassionally. I have found with this assignment, I feel more confident with my blogging on this site,because I know that the other people reading it are here for the same reason I am. Just to write, that's it. No showing off pictures or playing games or flirting or anything like that. The people here are blogging just because they enjoy writing, like me. Therefore, I have found that I have not blogged one single time on Myspace since I started here. I've been thinking about how I got started because of an assignment, but I think when it's over, I'll continue. Even though I don't have alot of followers or anything like that, I like to think that maybe people are reading, and just not letting me know. I enjoy the fact that I can get things out and not really worry about what people think of it. We bloggers all have our days where we type things and post them, even if they don't make alot of sense, but nobody thinks a thing of it, because we all understand. I read a blog recently about "blog lurkers" and for a while, I admit I was one of these people. Casusally searching and reading public blogs just to see what the world had to say, but not leaving any comments or questions about it. This person dared us lurkers to come out and start leaving responses because in truth, we all know that we enjoy them, and like to know what people think, and that somebody is hearing what we have to say. All in all, I'm liking this blog thing, and have even been trying to turn some other people on to it as well.